I'm only posing as a writer / Radio

I don't know how many times I've said this, but I can't write. I suck. It's not due to lack of praise, I get a lot of compliments about
my writings from an assortment of people. The problem is, after a while I don't believe a word of it. It's hard to when you have trouble writing things down all the time, like when I just want to write for fun. The words just don't come out. It's not writer's block, because I have plenty of ideas. I have at least 4 NOVEL-WORTHY ideas floating around in my head. Four novels would keep most professional authors busy for at least 10 years. But not me... no, I instead choose to spend my time playing GTA3 and listening to music. And then when I sit down I write a paragraph and can't write anymore. It really, really sucks.

Take my short stories for example. I've only written four. That's FOUR in five years of writing. I had a couple I was working on, but those got deleted when hell broke loose on my computer in November. But those sucked anyways, as far as I'm concerned. Now I've received compliments on all of them. That's all fine and good, really, but I dunno. Here's my view on them.

The Day I Got Good At Basketball: I wrote it in 8th grade. Enough said.
Scene From An American Movie: I copped the title from Everclear, I copped the idea from a dream my friend had about me. There's nothing original here.
Untitled Erotica: The response from this one was great. Two people thought it actually happened to me. There really is a Sheena that lived on the first floor of my dorm, but she never said a word to me. Honestly, I tried to write this like an intelligent erotic story.. so I dunno if hornballs would actually enjoy this.

I started one recently (actually it's one of my novel ideas) and I wrote a good 6 pages one night, and I decided to put myself on a regimen of writing 1 hour a night for the break. I did it for two days and stopped...

I shouldn't have to force myself to write. Not having ideas is one thing, but when I have them, I should be able to put down SOMETHING. But I don't.

I've also tried my hand at satire. News satire like The Onion. People thought I actually copied this one from the Onion. Another one actually made it to the ubiquitous FARK.com, though that was back in the days when comment threads rarely reached 100. I can only imagine what would happen if it made it there now...

FARK USER #1: This sucks. It's unfunny.
FARK USER #2: How many times are people going to rip off the Onion?
FARK USER #3: It's unfunny. And it rips off the Onion. Do something original.

As everyone knows, I also write songs, or if you prefer, (because I don't know how to write music) poetry. I call them songs because I write them with a melody in mind, or I write choruses, or if I'm really lucky I can write in a nice big vocal hook. But anyways, I'll admit there's a definite evolution in my songs. If you look at the stuff I was writing when I was 16 (The Girl, In A Hole), and compared it to my newer songs (anything at the top of the page) you'd see a big fuck difference. At least I hope so. But I still look back at most of it and think that none of them would ever work as hit songs, and none of them are "poetic" enough to be considered good poetry. So why bother?

I've tried at other forms of writing too, but I won't go into them in detail. I've written plenty of essays or rants, music reviews; I've even written a one act play. Still, I feel I'm no good. It all comes back to the fact that when I WANT to write, I can't. It's a horrible feeling, and one that I'm sure I'll have to deal with in years to come.