My friend the douche bag.

I just wanted to use that as a title. He is a douche bag, but I don't have anything remotely relevant to say about him now. Besides that I hate him. Anyways... I ahve no idea where this came from:


This is the raging alcoholic speaking. I drink alone, like George Thorogood on a really lonely night. Seven or eight beers and 2 hours later I'm seeing double and laying on the ground. I watch porn, and see two money shots. It would be cool except I can't really tell if the girl is cute anymore. But it's porn, so she must be. I hope she is.

I close the bars at 2am, and if I'm really lucky I get up at 6am to open the same bars. The barflies all know me by name, like at George Webb's. It makes me feel good, feel justified. There's no reason to drink, really. I've never gotten laid solely because of the alcohol. I've never really accomplished anythong because of it. I know, that's not the point. The point is to feel good, and there's plenty of that going on. It also helps to forget, for those 3 or 4 or 5 hours that your life really sucks, and on those nights I can go home happy... and wake up angry and worthless. On the real bad nights, I sit in my room and sulk. I listen to the sad-bastard music that only shy 16 year old boys should listen to. Maybe I am a 16 year old boy trapped inside. Or maybe I just want to be 16 again. Things were so great at 16, weren't they?

My life is a cycle that I can never escape. I am a raging alcoholic. Care to share a drink with me?